Disclaimer: If birth-related things gross you out, you may not want to read this. I wanted to write down every detail that I remember and some people may not want to know everything. If that's you, don't read. If you don't mind, read on! :)
Harley was due January 25. I hoped she'd come a little early because I was really tired of being pregnant and huge, but I had a feeling she'd be a stubborn little thing and come late. I had asked my midwives about induction, and they said they wouldn't do it any earlier than 41 weeks. That fell on the weekend and apparently the hospital doesn't like to do inductions on the weekends so I had to schedule it for Monday the 2nd.
The night before the induction I could not sleep at all. I knew I needed to get some rest but it did not happen. It was like Christmas Eve, I knew that within the next day or two I'd have my precious little girl! We woke up at 6:30am to call the hospital and make sure they had room for me. I was going to freak out if they said no, but fortunately they told me to come in at 7:30. I texted our doula Rianne and she said she'd meet us at the hospital.
After checking in and getting settled, the nurse asked if I wanted to have some music. They had Pandora playing a Norah Jones station and I told them that Harley liked Bon Jovi, so the whole time I was in labor we listened to 80's rock music. Who wouldn't want to enter the world to that??
They did my first examination at about 8:30am. I was 2cm dilated and 0% effaced, which was disappointing since they had told me I was about 60% effaced less than a week before. My midwife Morgan discussed my induction options with me, and we decided the first thing to try would be a pill that they put in my cervix that would make me have contractions. While waiting for the pill to do its job, I walked around, bounced on a birthing ball, ate breakfast and just hung out. It worked, but not well enough. I was having small, frequent contractions that I couldn't even feel. I was dilated a half a centimeter more and was 50% effaced. I had some visitors, Shaun and Eliza, who brought me and Jason food and kept us company.
At around 1:30pm I was given pitocin, which I had kind of wanted to avoid after hearing some horror stories. It was the best option though. Morgan didn't feel comfortable breaking my water because the baby wasn't low enough. The pitocin definitely worked. I began having very painful, intense contractions that were really close together. It got to the point where my contractions didn't even pause, I would have one long 10 minute contraction with no break. It was impossible. I threw up a couple times (surprise, surprise). I remember making a conscious effort not to breathe in Jason's face during contractions because I knew I had barf breath haha. Rianne was very helpful in reminding me to breathe through the contractions and I was surprised that it actually seemed to help me get through them. At some point during all this, Jason tried to compare my contractions to some bad gas pain he had a little while ago. I remember thinking,
are you kidding me?! Haha. After a few hours I decided I wanted to try laboring in the tub. The heat felt nice but it was also making me feel dizzy and lightheaded. By this point I was positive I could not take the pain anymore so I told Jason I wanted an epidural. Before being induced I was pretty set on having a natural birth, but as I went past my due date and decided to be induced, I knew the chances of me doing it naturally went down. At 5:45 I got the epidural. By then I was dilated 4cm and 80% effaced. Once the epidural kicked in I began feeling MUCH better. I didn't go completely numb, I could still feel and move my legs, and I could feel the pressure of each contraction.
I kept throwing up and feeling nauseous so I asked to have some Zofran. That helped with my nausea, but then I started having really bad acid reflux and every time I would lay down, I would throw up again. I was given Pepsid and finally felt better. Shortly after I was given the Pepsid, around 10pm, I started feeling a strong urge to push. I told the nurse and she said that's a good sign, but didn't really do anything. I told her again a few minutes later that I REALLY felt like I needed to push. She finally went to get Morgan, and when she came in she said "Oh, you're probably dilated to a 7 or so." When she checked me, she was surprised to discover that I was dilated to 9. I told them I needed to push! They had already taken me off the pitocin because it was working too well. Morgan decided she could break my water now and did so at 10:15pm.
At 10:30pm I was fully dilated, but Morgan wanted to let me rest for a little bit. I told her that my epidural was running out and I wanted more, but she told me it would really be better if I could feel when to push. I was starting to feel the pain again so I was scared, but I agreed to try. At about 12:30am I started pushing. I remember wanting to just not push at the next contraction, so I could take a little break but when the contractions hit, I couldn't NOT push. We tried a couple different positions. Jason had originally said he would stay up by my head but he wanted to see the action so he went down to the end of the bed and helped me hold my legs. I felt so incredibly exhausted, I had gotten NO sleep and had no food in me. I pushed for 2 long, excruciating hours. With one really big push, I went from her head not being out at all, to crowning. Nobody was expecting it to happen that fast. Jason's favorite part of my birth story was that with that big push, my catheter flew out. Morgan said she'd never seen that happen before. Since they weren't expecting this to happen so suddenly, they told me to wait while they got the extra doctors and nurses in the room. Up until that point I had been pretty calm, and quiet through my labor. No screaming or yelling, but that was when I started panicking. That big push hurt like nothing else and then they tell me to wait?! I started freaking out and couldn't hold still, I remember squirming all over and yelling "Get her out, pull her out!" Morgan asked if I wanted to reach down and feel her head, and I said no. I just wanted her out! Jason said when her head came out, she turned it and everyone freaked out and had to turn her head back down. Rianne was trying to help me breathe but the pain was too intense to think about anything else. What felt like hours later, they told me to push again and I was able to finish pushing her out. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, and I still can't believe I did it! Harley Savannah Katwijk was born at 2:38am.
She wailed just enough for the pediatrician to not be concerned, and they placed her on me right away. She didn't cry; instead she immediately looked up at me and stared at me with her big beautiful eyes. I got to hold her for about 30-45 minutes while they stitched me up. I tore really badly, and I could feel them stitching me up. It hurt like crazy but I just kept focusing on my sweet baby girl. She weighed 8lbs 9.7 oz and was 20.5 inches long.
It's been over a week since that traumatizing, yet wonderful event. I have wanted Harley for so long and I am ecstatic that she is finally here. She's as perfect as can be, and I am loving every second of being her mama.